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Tooth Fairy Visits Again

Monday, January 10th, 2011

Here’s the note Declan left for the tooth fairy tonight, after losing a tooth today, as well as the notes from the previous tooth:

Dear Tooth Fairy,

I would like to keep my tooth.  I lost this one eating a hot dog while I was ice fishing!  I caught the first fish while ice fishing!

I built you a fairy house, it’s not finished yet, but it’s by the garage by the stream.  It’s kind of snowed in right now, but you can come check on it when I dust the snow off.  Try to drop some supplies when you’re near our house.  Please put them on the porch or near the fairy house.

Thanks, Tooth Fairy.

Luv,

Declan

TF’s RESPONSE to Declan, plus the customary note for Quinn (sibling tax):

Dear Declan,

Happy New Year!  Congratulations on losing your first tooth of the year!  Were you surprised?
I’m so glad it happened during a special event for you — ice fishing! I happened to be flying by today and saw
you ice fishing with your friend!  He’s not one of my tooth fairy kids — what’s his name?  And congratulations
on catching the first fish – way to go!

Believe it or not, I have visited your fairy house already!  I LOVE it!!  It’s just so perfect!  I visited it after the first snowfall and some snow fell on me!  I’m afraid to go back and get my wings wet again while the snow is still there.  Do you know how long these things take to dry?!  Maybe I can help you build a roof or something.  I promise I will drop some materials off for you that I find on my journeys.

I also want to say that you are doing such a good job taking care of your teeth, lately!

Love, TF

Dear Kate,

Happy New Year!  You are getting stronger, you are growing, and you’re almost 5!  You are doing a great job of taking care of your teeth!  Did you know that the carrots and clementines that you eat are good for healthy teeth and body, too?  Brushing takes care of the outside of your teeth, eating healthy foods takes care of the *inside* of your teeth!  Too much sugar, like in cookies, cake, or candy, can really mess up your teeth.  Keep up the good work!

Love,

Tooth Fairy

———————————————————

Dear Declan,

Congratulations on losing another tooth! Thanks for the great note and the offer to build me a special house.
I’d be happy to drop off some materials whenever I fly near your house. I checked it off on your note, but I’ll put it here too, I’d really like my house to be by the stream. I love the sound of water! Also, thank you for the great present you made me, I can’t wait to show the other fairies, and for the great pictures you always add to my notes.

You asked what I look like, well, I have brown hair, and it’s pretty long right now, though I like to change my haircut a lot, so it might be short next time I visit. I have green eyes and pointy ears. My wings are mostly green and brown, but there are some hints of gold and purple in them too. Thanks for asking!

Love, TF

Dear Quinn,

Wow, Declan is losing so many teeth! I know it will be time for me to start collecting your teeth soon! Be sure and take good care of them for me!

Love, Tooth Fairy

Tooth Fairy Chronicles

Sunday, September 5th, 2010

Declan lost his first tooth on December 18, 2009.  Since then, we’ve been navigating the Tooth Fairy path for our family.  I mention these notes periodically on Facebook, and my awesome friend Darcy asked about seeing them in our blog.  So now I’m posting them here.  (Thanks for the great idea, D! xo)

The first note turned out to be a big deal for me.  I thought we’d just leave the treasure (a $1 coin) in response to Declan’s note.  But he asked questions, and I was thrown for a loop.  How should a Tooth Fairy note appear?  What are other things people do in Tooth Fairy traditions that I’d never think of?

Here’s what I ended up with after (literally) hours of checking on our HudsonValleyParents.com website, random Internet research, and crafting something sustainable we could repeat over and over again, for both kids for years (?) to come.  The Tooth Fairies messages are written in a tiny font size, in special fairy-font style, printed and cut out and left under his pillow with the $1.  Declan collects *everything*, and I was sure he’d be disappointed to miss out on keeping his lost teeth, so the Tooth Fairy invites him to decide whether to keep it or not, guessing correctly that he’d want to hold onto it himself.

1) Dear Declan,

Congratulations on losing your first tooth! Allow me to introduce myself.  I am the Tooth Fairy! I’m so happy to come visit you!  I’ll be back for every tooth you lose.  Thanks for your note.  I love notes!

You asked what I do with the teeth I take.  Different tooth fairies do things differently.  Here’s what I do — I ask the child.  Do you  want to keep the tooth or shall I turn it into fairy dust?  (Fairies need lots of fairy dust!) Either way, you get a little something from me. I’ll leave your tooth here tonight.  You can write back and let me know if you to keep it or let me take it.

See you soon, for your next tooth!

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

Now, Quinn hasn’t lost any teeth and probably won’t for a while, but she wrote a note to the Tooth Fairy, too.  So she always gets a note under her pillow now, too.  But, what to say?  Here’s what she got for the first note:

Dear Quinn,

Thank you for your note!  When you are five or six, you will lose a tooth like Declan.
I love to fly.  Thank you for giving your note to me!

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

The second note to Declan for Tooth #2 was pretty basic:

2) Dear Declan,

Congratulations on losing your second tooth!  I love your notes.  Have a grrrrrrrrreat day!

See you soon, for your next tooth!

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

It happened around the time of Quinn’s birthday in March — here is the note she got:

Dear Quinn,

Happy Birthday!  I’ll bet you got lots of good presents and had a wonderful party.

Love,

The Tooth Fairy


Now, for the third one around his 7th birthday, Mike helped the Tooth Fairy out and handwrote the notes, and I can’t find them right now to share here.  But the content had to do with  how many Tooth Fairies there are.  Mike said something about it being Regional, like one Fairy covers a particular Territory.  Here was my draft before I went to bed that night:

3) Dear Declan,

Congratulations on losing your third tooth!  I love your notes – great pictures, too!

You asked how many tooth fairies there are — there are

Have a wonderful BIRTHDAY!!!

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

D’s two latest teeth were lost recently within the past week.  The first of the two came out while he was eating a Chipwich after we went swimming.  I was waiting for him to get in the car with it, when he started freaking out and trying to spit something out.  He was so upset, he doesn’t like the blood aspect that happens when the tooth is released.  It turned out to be a totally different tooth than the very, very loose top one we’d been waiting for.  He doesn’t like to wiggle them, he says he likes for them to come out on their own.  So he doesn’t really tell us how things are progressing unless we ask, and if we ask too much, he won’t say.  So, this tooth taught me a lot.  I hadn’t really understood up to this point how much the loose teeth bother him, and how much the blood taste bothers him.  He’s told me in the past (the last tooth, actually) that he can tell what day the tooth will come out, because it becomes extra annoying in his mouth.  Well, this one caught all of us by surprise.  So the Tooth Fairy note addresses this in her message, as well as answering the questions he asked in the note.  He copied a ruler onto his notepaper and asked her how tall she is.  I found the note D wrote to the Tooth Fairy, I’ll post any others as I find them again.

Dear Tooth Fairy,

I would like to keep my tooth. And please draw a line on the ruler to tell me how tall you are. Are there boy and girl Tooth Fairies? Love, Declan

p.s. — Please leave this note here.

4)  Dear Declan,

Congratulations on losing your tooth!  Well *that* was a little unexpected, wasn’t it?
As you requested, I’m leaving your tooth here for you to keep.  And I have a feeling
I’ll be back again soon……

I love getting your notes when I come to visit you while you’re sleeping!  Thank you!
Yes, there are boy and girl Tooth Fairies. Which do you think I am?
Also, you asked how tall I am — I’m about the same size as the dollar I’m leaving here for you.
Great questions!

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

And for Quinn…..

Dear Quinn,

How are you?  How are your teeth doing?  Were you surprised when Declan lost his tooth?

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

So, here we are, at tooth #5.  I feel like I’m really starting to get the hang of how the Tooth Fairy rolls at our house.  This tooth was hanging on by a thread, and when Declan bent down to pet Casey on the way to taking her out the door, she got him in the face with her leg from being so excited.  When he stood up, the tooth was gone and he was in shock like, “What happened??”  We are planning for Declan’s trip to the dentist soon, and it occurred to me that the Tooth Fairy might be a helpful advocate for us around any dentist/cleaning/examination anxiety.  D and Q are also playing some on-line fairy games, where each fairy features a particular Talent.  This got woven into his note, and in the Tooth Fairy’s response:

5)  Dear Declan,

Congratulations on this latest tooth!  I just knew I’d be back so soon!  You got kicked by
Casey, right?  No problem, it was definitely ready to come out.  Sometimes teeth just
need a little help coming out, and our animal friends love to help!

So, yes, you guessed right — I am a girl Tooth Fairy.  How did you know?  Now, about my Talent.  Yes, all fairies have a Talent.  Mine is Tooth Tinker.   I help people celebrate their teeth no matter what age they are.  I help kids celebrate teeth that come out, but I also help when someone goes to the dentist for a cleaning or has a cavity or needs braces or whatever, I  come back and visit you while you’re sleeping to help you feel better about it if you have questions or anything.

I LOVE being a Tooth Tinker!  What’s one of your Talents?

Thanks for your notes and pictures.  I love them.

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

And Quinn’s note, a PSA for good brushing habits…..:

Dear Quinn,

How are you doing?  Are you helping your teeth feel clean every time you brush them?
You have such a beautiful smile.

Love,

The Tooth Fairy

With this on-going correspondence with the Tooth Fairy, Declan feels like he’s got a real “In” on understanding fairies, including size, Talents, etc.  He’s been sharing some of this knowledge with friends when it comes up, but it leaves lots of room for other families to experience fairies differently.  And Quinn wiggles her teeth periodically to check to see if she’s got any candidates to offer up.

So far, so much fun!  :D

Innocence, History, Strength, and Tagore

Saturday, March 6th, 2010

It’s our daughter Quinn’s 4th birthday today.  I felt drawn to some certain meditation but I wasn’t clear on what it was, and my regular meditations didn’t seem to fit this morning.

I sat for a while, eventually found myself traveling inward, through the umbilical cord of time.  I encountered some dark and some light, both opportunities for wisdom.  My next step was to draw some cards from Gentle Wisdom of the Faerie Realms.

I posed my question for the cards around parenting, specifically Quinn since it was her birthday, but it felt larger than that.  I asked for support to consider when I reflect on my past, present, and future around parenting.  I especially struggle with expression of anger.  I am away from the parent I wish to be when I am tired, overwhelmed, or feeling threatened.  I’m increasingly aware of the support I need during those times, and I’m seeing some healing for myself in this area.

Card 1 (past): Innocence

Card 2 (present): History

Card 3 (future): Strength

Before reading the interpretive book, I sat to relate and receive each of these concepts on my own.  Reflecting on the term Innocence lightened me when thinking about mistakes I’ve made in past parenting.  It took away some of the charge of the mistakes, helped me to remember there was more going on at any given moment than I am choosing to remember when I focus on the mistakes.  History felt like a huge permission to draw from past experiences while living in the present.  Like it matters.  So often I try to “be present” and feel awkward about where to hold history with that approach.  Drawing that card felt like it goes together in a way I seem to want to embrace naturally but keep pushing away.  Strength seemed a little heavy but true as I look to the future.  To admit that I need strength, then to explore ways I can become stronger.

Here’s what the accompanying text read:

Card 1 (past): Innocence — Open your eyes to your unique beauty.  The closed eyes of naivete lead to victimization.  Open your eyes. Innocence is regained through seeing the truth.  If you find the innocence in yourself and others, you will be able to forgive.

Card 2 (present): History — Your past leads you into your future.  Look to your past to learn, but keep moving into your future where you will bloom and flourish with what you have learned from your history.

Card 3 (future): Use all of your gifts and skills to propel yourself.  If you are stuck or are not moving, try something new — be creative! Life supports you to fly, to express yourself and your true nature.

Then I felt led to read some Tagore.  The quote we used for Quinn’s birth announcement was from this Indian poet: “You are invited to the festival of this world and your life is blessed.”  This morning, I opened the book and felt led to read this exact piece.  This is precisely where I’m at when I get angry.  Precisely.  I’m so grateful to see some of these feelings expressed in such a powerful way.

The Rain Has Held Back for Days
The rain has held back for days and days,
my God, in my arid heart.
The horizon is fiercely naked –
not the thinnest cover of a soft cloud,
not the vaguest hint of a distant cool shower.
Send thy angry storm, dark with death,
if it is thy wish, and with lashes of lightning
startle the sky from end to end.
But call back, my lord,
call back this pervading silent heat,
still and keen and cruel,
burning the heart with dire despair.
Let the cloud of grace bend low from above
like the tearful look of the mother on the day of
the father’s wrath.
~ Rabindranath Tagore

I’ve typed all of this up to give to my best friend who is a tremendous artist.  I’m going to ask her to make pictures with the text so that I can hang them in our house as supports to help guide me when I am angry.  This feels like the most luscious gift to myself, a gift inspired by Quinn’s birthday, which is ultimately a gift to our entire family.

Finally, I tell it to her every year, here it is again for anyone else who’d like to remember along with us: Quinner’s birth story.